My Thoughts Wesley Crawford

I'm reading "Tortured for Christ" by Richard Wurmbrand, he endured fourteen years in communist prisons for his faith in Jesus Christ. In this book he tells of the pain and suffering inflicted on them by the communists, many of which they led to Christ. He also talks about the underground church, that exists within communist prisons and without.

Reading this book has caused me to question my faith, do I truly believe? I've realized that I'm not going to any foreign country to preach the word. My call is here, so here I'll stay, and I'll be as good a witness as I can, surrendering to the will of God and trusting Him to direct my paths.

I've also realized that I need to spend more time and energy learning to love and worship Jesus. In this book, Richard doesn't talk about scripture and doctrine, they weren't allowed Bibles in prison. He talks of loving the ones who beat and tortured them, and this is done with the love of God. In our human mind, this is inconceivable, even maddening. When we stop looking at ourselves and start looking at Christ and Christ only, our character changes. We begin to hurt for the people we see who don't have faith in Jesus Christ. They don't know the love of God nor the peace of God, that surpasses all understanding. To know this love gives us the ability to love those who hate us. We are to love the sinner and not the sin, as Christ did.

How can you watch, as men rape and brutalize your wife and then be expected to love them. I don't know, I can't imagine it, but I'm learning to look to Jesus for comfort and direction and not myself. I want to know this love, the love that Jesus spoke of and that Richard spoke of in "Tortured for Christ". I want to love people, not because of their outward appearance or action or my personal gain, I want to love them, because it's our call, to love as Christ loved, unconditionally. This is the journey I'm on, actually, all who want to know God's heart, are on this journey. I feel like I'm still at lesson one, learning to trust God. I trust Him to bring me to the end of this journey, which will actually be the beginning of eternity.